UKSALSA CHAT | ON2 CHAT | SUZYQ CHAT 
Subject: How do I get women to dance?
From: Pres (Preston Palon)
Date: Friday 6th September 2002, 10:01 am

Actually there are huge differences between different Salsa events: There are small clubs with a regular crowd where the code is that everybody dances with everybody, as long as you are not too drunk, don't smell and are not dangerous to dance with. Then there are places that are no different from fashionable mainstream night clubs; Women say no most of the time. Usually it's quite easy to tell from advertising and appearance of the venue which category it belongs to.

It's the same with women: Some have a principle that they dance with everyone who asks them (as long as you are not too drunk, don't smell and are not dangerous to dance with), others are really picky. By observing people at clubs you can learn who is more likely to say yes.

Women who want to dance a lot often do quite clever things to ensure their success, and men can apply the same principles. Of course there are the obvious things like paying attention to your appearance and smiling and being friendly. Some women use the class before dancing to prepare things: If they want to dance with you they may compliment you ("Your lead is good!", etc...) or do something else that will ensure that either you will ask them or you will say yes if they ask you. Also, some women spot improver level leads who seem like they will become regulars, and then groom these people into regular long-term dance partners by helping them to improve and become part of the local scene. Men can do similar things...

Getting asked to dance by women isn't necessarily difficult. This works for me: First you need to find a place where there are more women than men, and where people come to dance rather than pose. Then you just need to look shy and eager to dance.

Finally, what works better than anything else is practising and improving your dancing. You have probably noticed what happens when a really good lead walks in: Women form a queue, or sometimes they just all attack at the same time. There are men who can hardly take a break to go to the toilet, because so many women are desperate to dance with them. It has little to do with their looks or personality, but everything to do with their ability to dance and ability to lead well.

   
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